Playing catch up.

I haven't posted in nearly two months.  A lot, I mean a lot has been going on.  So much that I don't know what to start typing about.  So, I will just leave you with a little running humor and put off my updates for another couple of days.  :)

Did I really just do that?

I threw out my scale last week. Yeah. It was a cute one. Pink in fact. I've had it for six trusty years. It supposedly could figure out my body fat percentage in just three to five easy seconds. However, I never agreed with the results. The body fat calculation or my actual weight. Us girls are just so silly. We go up in weight, and we go down in weight. Our jeans fit in the morning, but not in the evening. We have babies, we get back into shape, then we decide to have more babies. If we even take a short, non-threatening glimpse at a piece of cheesecake, we gain two pounds. How lucky we all are! So after a mental block two weeks ago, this was the only thing I could think of to stop my fear dead in it's tracks. What fear, you may ask? The fear of failing. For some reason, I was associating the numbers I kept seeing on the scale with my progress within the program. The numbers kept going up on the scale, which for some odd, silly reason meant that I was failing. I wasn't doing something right. Maybe this metabolic training thing just wasn't meant for me. Then I read this from my trusty commander and thought, "Light bulb!" {Another kid movie reference. Who can name the movie? Come on. Anyone?}

The bottom line is that the scale just doesn’t have any really valuable information for you. Everyone has heard the obligatory “muscle weighs more than fat” ad nauseum, but scale addiction lives on. Even though, as I pointed out above, weight says virtually nothing about attractiveness, it continues to be the primary focus of most women and many men when it comes to aesthetic goals. My advice to you if you have aesthetic goals: remember that humans are first and foremost visual creatures. Take circumference measurements, or just make note of clothing sizes. Why circumference measurements? Because you can see them. Maybe take a “before” picture of yourself and compare it to the body in the mirror from time to time. If your fitness level improves (more strength, power, speed), and you drop a pant size, is your weight important? If you really think about it, a rational person would be totally willing to gain a few pounds in exchange for losing an inch in their squishy spots. You can have a healthier perspective. Don’t obsess over the stuff that doesn’t really matter. Be rational when prioritizing your benchmarks and you can stay on track without pulling your hair out in patches. Just something to think about.

I was a scale addict. Always have been. Stepping on every single morning. I didn't need coffee. {Good thing, 'cause I don't drink coffee.} Then, one of two things would happen. I would either 1. Get mad. 2. Do a quick happy dance before getting in the shower. My entire attitude that day was based on a three-digit number {Yes, a three digit number. You two-digit number people will never be as cool as us three-digit people. Just sayin'.} It was cutting and damaging and a complete waste of energy. So, it's gone. The scale is gone. And honestly, I never should have bought it in the first place. You wanna know why? Because I am in week seven of my metabolic testing program and even though I haven't lost weight {Loosing weight was never my intention. Gaining weight wasn't either}, I feel stronger. I feel less jiggly and more lean. When I run, I am starting to notice a change in my form and in my breathing. This has been the most exciting change for me. My heart rate is staying lower and I am feeling great. So heck with you, Mr. {My scale has always been male. Just makes sense.} Taylor. There is no more room for you under my sink if the only thing you do is make me think I should be something I am not.

A few motivational motivators.

Those of you that know me well enough know that I likey me some sarcasm. It's healthy.
I made the hubby put drying racks in my otherwise boring laundry room for this reason and this reason only. You short people just don't get it.

I have this problem and I am not afraid to admit it. I have come so far and I need to remember that daily. Wait! Is GOTTEN even a real word?

Pretty to the point. I could change it to SHUT UP AND TRI. Then I would need to get me a suit, some goggles and some nerves in order to splash around in a lake somewhere, get out, run a race and then bike some crazy long distance. Oh. I guess I would need bike, too. I don't think the oldest would let me use sweet her Barbie ride. Although the bell might come in handy...

This has been a great reminder in our home. Except it kinda looses it's effect when one of the kids screams, then I scream back, my ears still ringing, "EXCUSE ME! IS THERE A FIRE?"

Thou shalt not whine.

Well, I am knee deep in week numero cuatro of my metabolic plan. A quick recap of last week: I almost gave up. Yes ladies and {those very few} gentlemen who read my blog, I was one more "Oh mom, your belly is kinda big!" comment away from quitting. Choking. Giving up. Surrendering. White flaggin' it. Abandon ship! Abandon ship! Then, the more and more and more I thought about quitting, I realized that I've never really quit anything in my life. And I wasn't ready to start now.

See, I told myself that I wouldn't step on the scale for the twelve weeks of my metabolic training plan. I just didn't want to play that mental game with myself. But three weeks into my program and my jeans didn't fit, then my jacket was getting tight around my arms, then my second-oldest daughter says to me the other night with her hand on my stomach, "Mom, I'm so excited. I just love babies!" Hold up. Stop. The. Train. "Momma's not having another baby, sweetheart." "Well," she said, "It's just getting bigger." I let that brutally honest conversation sink in for approximately three seconds before I jumped up off the couch, grabbed the AA batteries I had taken out of my scale a few weeks earlier, popped them in and stepped on. What I saw next kinda freaked me out. I really had nowhere to go. My husband already told me, "If you are in, be in. 100%. No complaining. No whining. No matter what happens." Hmmmm. Can't talk to him about gaining 12 pounds in 3 1/2 weeks. Who's next? Oh right. My boss. He's the one that took my tests. He's the one that also told me that I might gain weight at the start of the program. He can help me! So, here's what filled up his inbox a few minutes later. {I remember my mom telling me over and over again in high school, "Never, ever ever act or speak when you are emotional about something! You will make bad even worse!" I don't know if it's just a chick problem, but when the heck am I going to learn this lesson?}

O.k. Dan. When you started this whole metabolic thing, I bet you weren't expecting all of these crybaby e-mails. Well, here comes another one!!!!!! I did the unthinkable this morning. I stepped on the scale. Now, before you roll your eyes or start laughing, I went an entire three weeks without weighing myself. That's a first. But after this week, I got really scared. Well, last night was the tip of the iceberg when my second oldest looked at me, put her hand on my belly and said, "Ahhhh, I love babies." That's when I knew I was in trouble. So, 172. That puts me up 12-13 pounds in 3 1/2 short weeks. That is totally unheard of! What the heck is going on? I mean 6-7 pounds maybe, but close to 15 is making it quite hard to get the jeans on in the morning. I understand the science and totally get it, I just don't get what my body is doing. I think it mostly scares me....I've shed 100+ pounds by not doing any of the things I am doing now. I've never counted calories, never spent anytime below a 150 heart rate. So there is 1/2 of me who wonders how the heck is this weight going to come off? My 30 minute run yesterday felt like I was a load. Carrying alot of baggage. I'm not a visionary woman, but that extra baggage will make it quite difficult for me to run faster than I was last year. And then I start to think, I was just fine last year! I don't need to get faster, especially if I have to add 15 pounds in order to accomplish it. So, I really, really appreciate all of your help but please help me stay motivated!

I whined. I whined like the best of them. I may have even whined better than my own kids! Ahhhh...I hate when my kids whine. Well, my pity party didn't last long. Here's my butt kickin'!

I’m really tired of hearing about people who don’t see results in their workouts and their nutrition stinks. So I started to push this {metabolic training} because if you do things right, results are guaranteed 100%. What you are experiencing is NOT totally unheard of. It means that you are not tracking your intake correctly or that you are eating the wrong things – I haven’t even gotten in to that part yet (the what to eat part).The other thing is that you don’t understand the science behind it. I haven’t even begun to explain it to people yet, I have only explained about one tenth of what I know. You think that the presentations that I did was a lot of information? That’s only the beginning of what I know. If you understood it then you would know exactly why you have gained weight and exactly what kind of weight it is and exactly how to take it off properly. You should be Netting somewhere around your RMR, and 85-90% of your caloric intake for the day should take place before dinner. You can’t “save” calories for the end of the day, that’s one of the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard (I say that because I heard people talking about that the other day and that’s NOT how it works).That means that if you KNOW you are going to burn 800 calories in a workout that you need to PLAN to eat 1850 (or whatever your RMR is) plus about 700-800 more so about 2600 or so. People do see initial weight gain from this but if weight gain is excessive which it seems in your case, then in my experience, 100% of the time it is the person not tracking correctly or they don’t know what portions are and are having two or three portions but only counting calories for one portion.You won’t be the weight you are now in the competition phase of the training plan, we’re in the base phase (another thing that people don’t understand). So you’re right, I don’t need another email or message from someone because people have to be PATIENT!!!! Do you think that 3 1/2 weeks is patience as far as this goes? Everyone is different – for some people it takes well over a year for their body to adapt. It initially took me 10 months. So you have to be PATIENT!!!!!!!! I will help motivate you but you have to keep going and you have to figure out if you are truly tracking your intake correctly or not and then take a good look at what it is that you are choosing to eat. I’ll help with that if you want. Let me know. End of story.

There is something about brutal honestly that gets me fired up. It kinda takes me back to my college basketball playing days when I would mess up, get benched, get yelled at for my obvious dumb mistake, then get thrown back into the fight. I never really remember going back on the court feeling sheepish. I was ready to try again. I never gave up. So, with all the whining aside, I am ready to be patient. Oh, but my jeans are fitting pretty nicely today. And, I took the batteries back out of my scale. Those two things alone will help me get through these last eight weeks. And there isn't a white flag in sight.

Slurpin' fun.

So, after years of not caring, we now care. Wait. That sounds so blunt. I mean, we (I'm talking about me and the hubs here) care about a lot of things. We are almost borderline passionate about some things. Like hamburgers. And sports. But we've never really cared about our teeth. And why the heck would we? They just kinda are what they are. They come in when we are babies, fall out during grade school and then again when Depends show up on the shopping list. But let me just say this, after you see an x-ray of your head and actually see what those bad boys are doing inside of your jaw, you may start to care. I am typing this with spacers in between four of my back molars. It basically feels like there are thousands of popcorn hulls stuck between my teeth. And if my quick research on Wiki is reliable, this is done to space out a nice cozy spot for the anchors to fit. The anchors are the things that get tightened at appointments. The fun stuff. The fun stuff that causes headaches. So, I am a week behind the hubs in my treatment plan. He stumbled out of bed this morning in hopes that I would call in sick for him. He got his braces on yesterday. See, he actually needed braces. Poor guy. It was medically necessary otherwise a toothless grin was more than likely in his near future. Thank you military base dentists. So I told him, thinking he would chicken out, "Hun, if you do it, I will be right there with ya." Now, I am the one starting to make chicken noises. I feel for kids who go through this. Who go to the orthodontist and then off to school. Eeeewww. Ouch. With their stellar genes, our kids will be there soon enough. They actually think mom and dad are pretty cool right now. Wait until momma comes home next week with hot pink bands on her bottom row of metal. Oh yeah, you know that's right. Well, all this tightening of the bling creates a problem when trying to stick to a metabolic plan. One where consuming 2,700 + calories a day is required. Do you honestly know how hard that is without eating tortilla chips, soft candy, hard nuts or Twizzlers? But, you gotta do what you gotta do. So, I did some digging and found some smoothie recipes. I just tried this bad boy out for lunch. Yum. Pure yum. I could get kinda used to this soft diet routine if it involves smoothies like this. Give it a try. I'm sure it's delicious with or without braces.

Banana Peanut Butter Smoothie

1/4 C peanut butter

2 TBs honey

1/2 C ice

1 C milk (I used almond milk)

1 medium banana

Mix in blender for 30 seconds. Serves 2. Per serving: 356 calories; 4 g saturated fat; 13 g unsaturated fat; 6 mg cholesterol; 43 g carbs; 202 mg sodium; 13 g protein; 3.5 g fiber.

It's not easy being loved.

I believe that each day needs a little morsel of motivation behind it. And no, I'm not talking about the chocolate chip ones that come out of the bag. Even though, those are pretty yummy motivators. Anway, I'm fairly convinced that without motivation, life just passes us by and then one day whamo! Before you know it the hubby is pushing you into an Active Older Adults exercise class in your wheelchair. I'm having this vision of my husband pushing the back of my chair towards the ground so that I would be doing a wheelie. He would be yelling, "Woah cowgirl! Take 'er easy!" He's just that kind of guy. Anyway, life needs purpose. It needs direction. It needs meaning. Without these three things, you might as well just stay in bed and let life keep going on without you. And that's exactly what I didn't do this morning. Because I have a plan {a goal} that I am sticking to right now. And, quite honestly, because if I don't get my workout in before 7am, it's just not gonna happen that day. So, my point. Motivation+purpose+direction+meaning=you can basically do whatever you put your mind to. However, when one of these items suddenly falls out of the equation, it's a slippery slope to dead-goals land. What can you possibly do in life with motivation but without purpose? How about meaning without motivation? You can have a purpose for your goal but without direction, your path is quite dark and dreary. Each day is a blessing to do some good. I've had a few experiences over the last couple weeks that have helped me realize the great significance of living a grand life from day to day. A life of purpose and meaning. I am grateful for those personal reminders. Now, to end on a humorous note, today's inspiration came from my second-oldest child who brought this sweet Valentine home from kindergarten. Can you translate it? Hint: the 6th word is HAVING.

Ha! I love it. Seriously laughed my butt off reading this today. And do every time I read it....You are welcome, Lillsters. You are welcome.

Dos.

We live in such a funny world. It's so fast and furious. Yesterday I made myself my own little mini-vacation just to try to get way from it all. I turned our living room couch towards the south-facing windows so the sun would shine on my Minnesota-pale face. I started the dishwasher to simulate the sound of ocean waves. Then, I took a nap. And what came of this? A reality check. See, we want everything so dang fast these days. The problem is, we can pretty much get what we want when we want it. We have supercenter grocery stores, shopping malls, credit cards, the Internet. What we need (or want) is usually within a short reach. But then, we want something that we can't grab right away. Something that is going to take some time. And all of a sudden, we get all pouty and sad. Disappointed. Frustrated. Take Veruca Salt, for example. All that poor girl wanted was a golden goose, for Heaven's sakes. Then, she gets a bit carried way and her needs suddenly include things like balloons and baboons. I, like Veruca, want something. It's an odd something. Something not too many other people in the world want. Ironically enough, I want to get faster. Wait. Wasn't I just trying to escape the fast by making my own cheap 30-minute living room vacation? Yeah, kinda. But the fast I need is through running. And, according to my metabolic plan, I am going to have to wait eleven more weeks to find improvement. Just improvement, folks. Not perfection. Improvement in my times. Improvement in my overall fitness. I am in week two of my twelve-week off season metabolic training plan. My body is going through some funky kind of "you haven't been treating me very nicely over the last couple of years" backlash. The proof is in the pudding (Oh, yummy decedent chocolate pudding with whipped cream on top and a few graham crackers for crunch): If you do not feed your body properly while training for some fun event, you may do alright. You may even PR. However, you won't be doing your absolute best. And that's what I want to do. My own personal bestest best. So, even though this is going to be a long process, I am committed. Kinda like these kids are. 'Cause the best things come to those who wait.